Mother's day this year was as good as I expected. Which was not much! Considering being a mom for the last 7.5 years I knew how this day rolled around, and things still need to get done, there are still diapers to be changed, kids and husband to be fed, dishes to do, and cleaning up. Just because it is "Mother's Day" doesn't mean you are fully off the hook! But despite still having to get those things done, I think that we are still appreciated. The boys made me gifts from school and this has been a fun year to receive those! Keenan was partially understanding what Mother's Day was, and was excited to give me his gift! He made me a colored hand print and then wrote his name under it. I love looking at how he writes his name. He has made some great progress being in school! Whoever says that preschool is just a time out for mom is wrong. Or in my situation. Keenan has grown and learned leaps and bounds! Damon made me a folding card that has pictures of him, and some scrapbooking decals with I Love you Mom. The pictures make me smile to see the joy he has when he's at school.
I would be lying if I wasn't feeling down for the majority of the day. I feel so in adequate as a mom. I am always questioning why I am a mom, how horrible of a job I's doing, yelling at the kids to get such and such done, why do I have to ask all the time, stop whining, be nice to your brother, and the list goes on. I hope that they will remember the good I did and hopefully will forget the yelling. I am trying and I hope that they can see that. I am grateful that every day is a new day, that I can go to sleep knowing that I love them with every ounce of my blood, that they make me so proud, and that I can call them my children.
1 comment:
This is what my friend wrote on Facebook a couple days ago:
"I will pay someone $10 to do the following: When you're asked to speak in church on Mother's Day, stand up and give a talk about how your mother yelled at you, was irrational, punished you, let you eat cereal for dinner, would lock herself in her room/bathroom, swore sometimes, and made lots of mistakes. Make the congregation laugh and then the mothers will think, "I'm glad I'm not the only one." And then talk about how in spite of imperfections and unmet ideals, our moms are PERFECT moms because they are perfectly trying to be the best moms they can be, and they love us in spite of our imperfections too.
Until someone dares to do that, Mother's Day Talks will be the bane of every mother's existence. So here's my challenge: who's going to be the first to break this cycle of "you could be better" and "here's someone you can't possibly live up to" speeches?"
It made me laugh and she did get a talk from a youth that did just that and she is going to give him $10! So you are definitely not the only one to feel like this. I am sure our own mother felt the same way:)
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