Being Carried

One thing I love about having a smart phone is the opportunity to write a quick journal entry when a thought enters my mind. A few weeks ago, I had a moment that I realized a major support in my life. Having a special needs child is the hardest thing I have ever done and will continue to do. From being physically draining to mentally draining. Many times I have been told/asked how I do it. My response has always been "you just do it." Up until this moment, And I can't pinpoint the exact moment or what was mentioned to make me realize that I have literally been carried by Christ in every aspect of being Damons mom. I really had not been.able to know how I could do it with him and how easily it came. Easy in a way that you just do it. It is something I cant explain. I have many rough days when I wonder how my life would be so much easier after he passes, or how life would be so much easier without a SN child. I have had to repent so many times from things I have said, or done, and but I know that Christ is with me all the time. "He never said it would be easy, He only said it would be worth it."
As Im writing this, I remeber where this came to me. We recently startes getting the Ensign again.after years of not receiving it, and there is a talk in there by David A Bednar. (March 2013) It is called "The Enabling Power of the Atonement"
He says, " I suspect that we are much more familiar with the nature of the reedeming power of the atonement then we are with the enabling power of the Atonement"
"Heavenly father and the Savior can inspire, comfort, and strengthen us in our time of need, if we remember to cast our burdens at their feet." He speaks of a woman who had.lost her husband to early onset Alzheimers disease. She pleads for help on days she cant do it alone. Where in the end she feels Gods strenth.
"To me", she says, "this is the power of the atonement. I know I cannot.change my situation, but I can change how I respond. I have to humble myself and depend on him for help.

" When we understand the enabling power of the Atonement, we will.be changed; we will have access to strenth beyond our natural abilities, our weekness can be turned to strength, and we can know that in the strength.of the Lord, we can do all things." -Bednar
I can honestly say that I have felt that strength beyond my own. I am so grateful for these words. They spoke to me.in such a comforting way. i know that I am never left alone. Children are what Christ loves more then anything. They are his children. I am gratful for the opportunity to have this perfect spirit in my home. To have such a spirit where he is not tempted by.anything and that Satan cannot grasp him is an amazing feeling! I love that boy like crazy!